Long time no see (or write? 🤪)! The first quarter of 2024 has been eventful to say the least, but I really can’t complain too much. I’ve had an amazing start to 2024. To wrap up the first quarter of 2024, I will do a mini recap that will be a bit different than my usual budget/debt review format.

Travel

To start with, I went on a Northern Lights chasing trip to Alaska which unfortunately ended in a failure. We were hit with an unexpected warm front the week we went which led to some cloudy days with precipitation. I was especially sad for my mom since this was her big wish.

On the bright side, we still enjoyed the daytime activities as Alaska is just simply gorgeous! From hot spring, dog-sled, and ice museum to just walking on a scenic path, I had an amazing time and definitely would love coming back in the summer (maybe by cruise?)!

This was also the first time I joined a tour group based in the city next to mine. I was hesitant as the demographic was mostly middle-aged people around my mom’s age, but they were all kind people who I had a blast traveling with! It was just an all-around good environment and I actually connected with another person around my age I now keep in touch with!

Work

To continue on the positive note, work has honestly been great. This is the closest to a unicorn job I can possibly ever ask for.
– Work from home ✅
– Good salary ✅
– Low/medium stress level ✅
– Great boss ✅
– Flexibility in taking time off ✅

I mean don’t get me wrong, there are some stressful days, but overall I’ve had more good days than bad this year. 

My annual evaluation and bonus came out this quarter and I received a 5% increase in my base pay and a bonus payout which amounted to roughly 20% of my base pay! I know this was based on my performance (and company revenue) from last year which was filled with stress and overwork so I truly think I deserved it.

However, now that I’ve been able to relieve some of my duties to the new hire, I can’t help but think, is this too good to be true? While things have gotten better at work, I still can’t shake off the burn out. I have this deep fear that my boss is now finally starting to see that my drive has been slipping and I’m not as productive as I used to be. Is she also sensing my burn out?

I can’t help but still make constant looks at my Empower dashboard to check how far away I am from FIRE. It amazes me to see my net worth fluctuate upwards of $7k just from daily fluctuations in the market. That’s nothing on my salary!

1st Quarter Net Worth

Speaking of market fluctuations, the first quarter of 2024 is probably the most successful quarter I’ve ever had financially.

I continued with my front-loading strategy this year and thanks to the generous work bonus and taking minimal take home pay this quarter, I’ve maxed out my 401k and Roth IRA for the year! I’m excited to finally pocket more money next quarter. Realistically though, it’ll likely be invested in my brokerage account anyways.

Now, the craziest thing to happen this quarter… my net worth increased by $78k!! Yes, that is deserving of two exclamation marks because in what world do I just get a $78k increase in 3 months? And the crazier part is that a big chunk of that increase did not come from my paycheck 🤯. My money was just making more money from being invested!

Recall that at the end of 2023, I was $5k away from hitting $400k. Well, not only did I finally hit it, it’s just crazy that I’m now $27k away from $500k!

Dating

Now that work has settled down a bit, I find myself being able to focus on other aspects of life, namely dating. I feel like I should write out my experience both for memory and maybe in case it helps others read about the experience from a 30-something year old woman’s perspective.

So without further ado, here’s my online dating recap no one asked for!

For a while now, two of my friends have been encouraging me to get on the apps but my perfectionist tendencies have led me to procrastinating. I wasn’t in the right place, I don’t know what to put on my dating app prompts, I don’t know what pictures to use… were some of my excuses. What if I meet serial killers like the documentaries I’ve seen on Netflix? Fear kept me from pursuing it.

But friends are amazing. For a while, my hesitation has been that I’m just not ready to settle down. One of my closest friends, who I consider almost as a big sister, encouraged me to get some dating experience even if I’m not ready currently as it might take a while for me to find someone so I should start now. 

It’s true because I haven’t had too much dating experience the last couple of years and I know the person I am now is not the same as I was before which means what I look for in a relationship has also changed.

Another friend who is actually my coworker came in clutch when she showed me all the dating apps she has and graciously let me press around with it which really took the fear aspect away. 

On the plane right over to Alaska, I read (or rather listened to) an audiobook version of How to Not Die Alone which really changed my mindset. It helped me put into perspective what really mattered in finding a long term partner and really resonated with me.

So with all these forces combined with me recently getting yet another year older, I created my first dating profile in February! And maybe I’ve just not been jaded yet but things have been… going well?

I certainly haven’t come across any of the nightmares people have talked about. While I’m not in a relationship yet, I’ve talked to a couple of guys and my overall impression is that they have gone well so far. 

I don’t know what the “right” online dating etiquette is, but from what my friends have told me, the nature of how online dating works, you are supposed to just talk to multiple people at once which is such a tough idea for me to wrap around.

But to be honest, it makes sense to just spend a good 15-30 minutes all at once swiping likes or passes. I’m not going to wait for a like to like me back, start a conversation, and see if it works out before hitting another like.

However, the problem with that is the conversations and dates all come at once! I started the app in February and halfway through chatting, I left on my trip to Alaska which led me to pause all meet-ups till March. Well, let me just put the numbers out there. In the month of March, I’ve gone on 17 dates with 9 guys total (+ 1 more with a guy who after our first date, we decided we were better off as friends).

And the confusing part, is that all these guys were great! I mean there were definitely some (like the guy I am now just friends with) who I know we weren’t going to work out. But for the most part, everyone else were great and I wouldn’t say no to a 2nd date. And even if I later figured I wouldn’t want to pursue a relationship with one of them, do we just ghost each other or should we try to remain friends?

Is this the norm to go on this many dates? Are the guys I’m seeing also going on this many dates? I mean let’s face it, I’m mediocre in looks and my profile is nothing to rave about. So I have to imagine that if I’m going on this many dates, so is everybody else?

Is it weird that it’s going this well? In fact it’s gone so well that I’m a bit overwhelmed?!

A friend of mine who is also going through the apps said I should start journaling. Instead, I started an Excel 😬. Yes, you read that correctly. You know I love my excels.

I started an Excel at first to journal a “like” and “dislike” list to become more attuned with what I want in a partner. I’ve since added a “Notes” tab for each guy so I don’t mix up little tidbits about them 🥲.

Is this normal? I would love to hear from others’ (guys or gals!) perspectives if any of you readers would kindly share your experiences in the comment below or you can personally email me at millennialmayday@gmail.com.

Help a girl out because this one is confused!